Let’s grow together.
Life is a journey of learning, mis-steps, growth, and celebration. For 20 years I have supported people of all types, shapes, and sizes to achieve a more fulfilling, meaningful life. To dream big and pave a path that is seemingly impossible. I’ve believe there’s a dreamer in all of us, and when we find focus and support, we can achieve greatness for ourselves, families, and community. I know you can too. Below are some personal learnings on love and life.
On Work
When it comes to work, we’re constantly wondering: is this what I’m meant to do? Truth is, if you’re age 24 or 54 the answer is the same. Your your career is a journey, with many destinations. Stop worrying about the destination and instead, look at your journey as a series of stops. The average person will have 12 jobs in a lifetime. That’s 12 stops!
Think about what it is you want to gain out of that stop. Is it a skill to pick up? An addition to the resume? An impact on your company or community? Do as much as you can there, then move on. Try to leave on a positive note. Change can be difficult as the future is the unknown, but trust me, it’s only when you look back in the rear view mirror can can you truly appreciate what you learned and accomplished.
On Relationships
It was summer break and Oprah was on the television. She said if you want your someone to be a better cook, find ways to encourage their cooking skills instead of complaining about their food. That with the right supports, they would get better at cooking. Okay, I paraphrased that. I was only in middle school. Still, the sentiment stands. When my husband is doing something with positive intentions, I make sure not to only point out faults, but provide the feedback and support he needs to better and foster a love of cooking. Later in our relationship, we read a report on successful relationships giving 10 positive affirmations for every negative comment. That seemed extreme, but solidified my belief in Oprah — not that she needed any help!
On Family
I am close with my parents and sister, but we live far apart — which is tough. Growing up in an immigrant Chinese, Vietnamese, and dance community we had people over at our house multiple days a week. My parents had an open arms policy – always welcoming people into our home and feeding the community. It was about building community and honor our heritage. When I left my family and moved across the country 10 years ago, there was a massive hole in my heart and I know in theirs. What I now know is, we’re often pulled in many directions. So instead of feeling guilty, I am now thoughtful about the relationship that I want and can have with my family (while being considerate of what they want as well).
Bonus: Follow Your Heart
The reason I love being a career and leadership coach is that people are amazing. You are amazing! Every day you get up and tackle the day. You try your best and you don’t give up, even when it’s hard. Most do it not for themselves, but for family, colleagues, parents, principals/ethics, or to build a better future. What I want to leave you with is stop and think about what your heart desires. Stop having self doubt, stop pushing your dreams and passions aside. Start making time for you. Not just spa time (though that is nice), but do something that feeds your soul and sets you on a path that is more fulfilling for you. No need to drop everything, but start taking the steps that will allow you to take a leap. You’ll find that when you’re on a more fulfilling journey, you’ll be a happier version of you — more ready to take on the world, for you, your family, and the community.
